I Love Sweeney Todd

I love Jordan so much, and he looks so hot in gym clothes.  And you know what else?  HE CALLED ME ON MY CELL LAST NIGHT!  I'm not kidding.  I picked up the phone and it was him on the other line.  It was so freaky, I immediately hung up.  And then I smacked myself for being so stupid.  I could have had a conversation with him!

Hello mother.  Hello father.  I am smoking, Marijuana.  Cocaine is good, but crack is better.  I'm so high I don't know why I'm writing this letter.  Thanks for the condoms, they're really working.  Except for when, I got her smoking.  'Cause then I r*p*d her, up her *ssh*l*,now I've got a son called Billy Crackle.

That is a rhyme Amber taught me today.  Isn't is so completely sick?

-Isabelle, your lawfully wedded wife.